Newborn Photo Shoot

Dear Brandon,

Now that we have all your newborn photos, I thought I would include some as a way to wrap up this blog/book. The photos were taken when you were about two weeks old. Many people commented on what an expressive face you have!

I hope you've enjoyed reading this as much as I've enjoyed writing it!

Our Midwife and Homebirth Experience

Dear Brandon,

I thought I'd write a little bit about our experience with midwives and our homebirth. I knew I wanted to have a midwife from the beginning, but it was something I had to convince your Dad of! We talked a lot about it and did some research. Midwifery care is great because its a lot more personlized than care with a doctor. In the beginning of my pregnancy we saw one of our three midwives about every five weeks, and that gradually increased to weekly appointments once I was 36 weeks along. Each appointment was 30-45 minutes long, and we were given lots of information as well as the opportunity to ask questions. It was really nice to get to know them, and feel comfortable with each. Any one of them could be on call when it came time for your birth, so it was good to be able to see each of them equally during my pregnancy. Many people have asked whether we would use midwives again, and our answer is 100% yes! We couldn't have been happier with the care we received.

As for homebirths, this was something that I had always been open to, but Daddy had never even considered it. Around the beginning of my third trimester, we began to talk about it with our midwives. Daddy was quite worried that it wouldn't be safe, and felt like we should be in the hospital. We attended an information session, and were able to hear other peoples' experiences with giving birth at home. Daddy found it especially helpful to hear from other dads. We spent a lot of time talking it over with each other and asked questions of our midwives. We were told about studies that have shown that home birth is just as safe (if not safer) than hospital births, provided the pregnancy is progressing normally. There is very strict criteria that I had to meet in order to be eligible to give birth at home.
Eventually Daddy came around to the idea, and realized that it probably would be more comfortable to be able to labour at home, be in our own environment, and do things on our own terms. I liked the idea of being in my own bed after the birth, and having the ability to eat food from home!
We went ahead and purchased a homebirth kit which contained most of the supplies we'd need (things like garbage bags for dirty laundry, waterproof sheets to put on our mattress, and absorbent pads to catch any fluid. Many people think that a homebirth would be really messy, but once the midwives were gone there was very little evidence of what had just happened!
Midwives don't have the qualifications to administer pain relief like laughing gas or epidurals, so I knew that a homebirth meant going drug free. I was worried that I wouldn't be able to handle the pain, and would end up in the hospital begging for drugs! In reality, Daddy told me that I never once asked for drugs, and only said things like "ouch" and "it hurts" right at the very end. I guess subconsciously, I knew that if I decided I needed help with the pain, I'd have to go to the hospital which wasn't what I wanted at all. But I don't recall thinking about pain medication during labour at all.
Once you were born it was so nice to be able to start bonding with you in our bed right away. You weren't going to be whisked away from us to be examined. The midwives stuck around for about two hours after you were born to make sure you and I were both OK. One midwife comes to check on us everyday at home for the week after your birth, then we will go into their clinic for checkups up until about 6 weeks. They listen to your heart and lungs, take my blood pressure and pulse, help out with breastfeeding, and answer any questions we have. They've also given me lots of tips already about breastfeeding, to make sure you are getting what you need until my milk comes in.
We actually didn't tell many people that we were planning a homebirth; not because we felt the need to justify our decision, but rather because we weren't sure how our family and friends would feel about the idea. The last thing we wanted was to hear any negative or skeptical opinions. Daddy decided not to tell anyone in his family, but I told my parents and sister, who were all very supportive. Now many people are asking me if it was planned or not, and want to know all about it! They will all soon find out that it was a wonderful experience, and we'd definitely do it again!

You're Here!

Dear Brandon Connor,

You're finally here! You were named after Daddy's oldest brother, who tragically lost his life in a car accident in 2000. Connor is a name that both Daddy and I liked.

At about 12:15 am on June 14th, I was laying in bed trying to fall asleep when I felt and heard a "pop" in my abdomen. I had heard that that's a common sensation to feel when the amniotic sac (bag of waters) breaks. I didn't feel any fluid right away, until I sat up in bed to switch sides. I woke up Daddy and told him that my water just broke. He turned on the bedroom light and sure enough, the sheets were wet. Good thing we'd put the waterproof mattress cover down a few days before! We first paged Beth, the midwife on call at the time and told her. At that point I wasn't yet feeling any contractions, so she advised me to take a few Tylenol, and try to get back to bed, as it can sometimes take up to 24 hours to start having contractions. Next I called my parents to let them know, as my Mom was planning to come over and hopefully be there for the birth. She would have to wait until the morning to catch the ferry over. Daddy sent a text message to his Mom. So we went back to bed despite our excitement and realization that the day had finally come. I was shaking like a leaf! About half an hour later, I started to feel some contractions. They weren't painful at first, just uncomfortable so I was able to partly ignore them. Within a few hours they were getting uncomfortable and I had to breathe through them, while at the same time sitting up in bed and walking back and forth. Around 4am, it was obvious that I wouldn't be getting any more sleep, so we got out of bed and moved to the living room. Daddy started timing my contractions, and they were about four or five minutes apart. Over the next two hours, it started to get intense. I generally would get down onto the floor on my knees, and put my arms on the couch. I moved my pelvis around which felt better than staying still or standing up. I was breathing quite hard by this point, and Daddy would help me take drinks of water when each contraction was over. Around 6:30am, Daddy called Beth again to let her know that things were getting pretty hard for me. I managed to speak to her on the phone and answer her questions, but I had to stop talking during the contractions. She suggested getting into the bath, and let us know she was on her way. Daddy ran the bath nice and warm, and in I got. I found it relaxing to lay back a bit in between contractions, but found I had to sit up and squeeze Dad's hand to help me through. I was already starting to feel pressure and was getting the urge to push, but was trying hard not to until Beth arrived. About 45 minutes later she finally arrived and I soon got out of the bath. I moved into our bedroom and got on my hands and knees on our bed. She checked my cervix and found that I was fully dilated and could start pushing anytime. Daddy held my hands the whole time and I started pushing with each contraction. It wasn't long before I laid down on my side, with one knee bent and facing the ceiling. This helped to open up my pelvis so that you could come down as easily as possible. After 20 minutes or so, Beth told me to reach my hand down and feel your head. That was pretty cool, and it gave me more energy for pushing, knowing you were so close. After about an hour of pushing, I felt some intense burning and stinging as your head and shoulders emerged. Then your body and shoulders came out, and that was the best feeling ever! After about nine hours, the hard work was done and we finally got to meet you at 9:35am on June 14th. I was 39 weeks and 4 days along. I wanted to have music playing during my labour, and you were born to the song Let Her Cry by Hootie and the Blowfish. It seemed appropriate, since I had a few tears of joy! You laid on my chest for a while, and Dad was able to cut your umbilical cord. Eventually one midwife did your newborn checkup, which included listening to your heart and lungs, and weighing, measuring you. You were smaller than we thought you'd be; 6 pounds, 14 ounces! You were 21 inches long.

After your birth I still had to deliver the placenta. I was given a shot of oxytocin in my leg as you were being born to help my uterus contract and squeeze out the placenta. I just had to push a few times gently and it came out. The next part was a bit scary for Daddy and I, because I continued to bleed, and lost more blood than the midwives generally consider to be normal. They said I lost about 800ml, and the average for a vaginal delivery is 500ml; 1000ml for a C-section. They gave me another shot of oxytocin and began to massage my uterus on top of the abdomen. It wasn't working though, so they had to give me another drug that just dissolved under my tongue. That did the trick, and the bleeding finally stopped. Beth had to give me a few stitches since I had a bit of tearing, but she said they were very minor and would heal within a few days. Once that was done, I finally got to hold you and try to breastfeed. Daddy and I just admired you and couldn't stop staring! You were born with dark hair like me, and the typical bluish-grey eyes that most newborns have. It will be interesting to see what color they turn out to be.

My mom arrived about two hours after your birth, and was sad that she missed it. She did her best though, and she fell in love with your gorgeous face right away! So that's the story of my labour and your birth! Beth told us that it was a relatively quick labour considering this was my first pregnancy. She also said I have a very high pain tolerance, since I didn't have any painkillers during labour and it all happened quite quickly. As I said it was intense at the end, but part of me also wondered when it was going to get worse! I am going to write more about the actual homebirth experience in another post, but first I will include some of the first pictures of you!

Week 39

Dear Sweet Pea,

I am 38 weeks along today, but there isn't really much to report! In terms of your development, you're pretty much good to go now. You are putting on a bit more fat and your lungs continue to mature, but you'd be perfectly fine if you were born today. I am feeling pretty sore and tired, but am trying to stay somewhat busy with house cleaning and baking for after your birth. It will be nice to have a few things we can just pull out of the freezer.

I went for my spa day today and it was nice and relaxing. I had my fingernails and toenails painted blue since you're a boy! I also installed your carseat today, so that's ready to go too. I think I've accomplished everything I wanted to before your arrival, so anyday now would be nice :)

Here's today's picture:

Week 38 - Full Term!

Dear Sweet Pea,

I know I just posted an update a week ago, but I couldn't resist doing another one today, because I'm officially full term now! I feel happy to have finally reached this milestone. By now you're fully developed, and are just putting on baby chub now. You could be about 7 pounds and 21 inches long this week.

I've been off work for a week now and the days have just flown by! Seems like time is going by faster and faster. I've been doing a lot of cleaning and organizing around the house. Your bassinet is ready to go beside our bed, and I've been tidying up your room. We need to get the carseat installed as soon as possible. Its exciting to think that you could arrive any day now!

Your aunt Erin will be arriving from Australia on June 16th, so she would really like it if you could stay put until then, so she can be there for your birth. Part of me wants you to wait, and part of me wants you out right now! We all know you'll come when you're good and ready :) Everyone is so excited to meet you!

Week 37

Dear Sweet Pea,

This is a few days late because I was out of town for the weekend, and didn't get a chance to post before I left. My mom threw me a baby shower this past weekend, so that was really fun and we got some great gifts for you!

I'm just over 36 weeks along now, and looking forward to being considered full term by the end of this week. I finished work last Thursday, and today is my first official day of maternity leave! I've put in my application for maternity/parental leave benefits so that I can continue bringing in a bit of income while I'm off work. I'm happy to be off and looking forward to a bit of a break before you arrive. I'm going to do a lot of cleaning around the house, so the challenge will be for Daddy to help me keep it clean! I think I'll also do some cooking and baking to put in the freezer. Once you arrive, it will be nice to be able to pull food out instead of having to worry about cooking.
At this point in my pregnancy, I'm just ready to not be pregnant anymore! I feel huge and I'm still dealing with pressure and discomfort in my lower back and pelvis. I seem to be retaining a lot of fluid and notice swelling in my hands and feet. In fact, last week I ended up having my engagement and wedding rings cut off my finger in the hospital, because I couldn't get them off after having our maternity photos done! They went on easily enough (with the help of some hand lotion and a bit of force) and I figured they'd come off with an equal amount of effort...not so! Daddy and I tried every trick in the book in our attempt to remove them, but nothing was working. My finger was swelling more and more and turning purple, and we didn't want it to get worse. I felt like an idiot for insisting on putting on my rings for some pictures, and now its been quite the expense to get them fixed. I'm sure that soon, I'll be able to laugh about it, but right now I'm still a little sad about having something so sentimental cut off of myself! But enough about me, lets talk about you!

At this point you weigh about 6.5 pounds and should be at your full birth length (about 20 inches from head to toe). Your head is engaging in my pelvis, and you get the hiccups all the time as your practice your breathing. You will continue to gain about 1/2 a pound a week, and that will mostly be fat! Other than that, you're pretty much ready to enter the world anytime!

Here's the most recent photo:

Maternity Photos

Dear Sweet Pea,

Last week Daddy and I got together with our friend/photographer to have some good maternity photos taken. Here are a few favourites:

One Month Left!

Dear Sweet Pea,

Today marks one month until my due date! These days, 37 weeks along is considered full term, so that's in just 10 days. Its really so hard to believe that Dad and I will be meeting you so soon. For me, the fact that I have a little human being growing inside of me is still sort of foreign. I can feel you all the time of course, but I guess because I can't actually see you, it doesn't really seem real.

Tomorrow we'll be getting together with our friend/photographer, Stefanie, to get some maternity photos taken. Originally we were going to do it at the beginning of the month, but then had to reschedule a few times because of the weather (we plan to do it outside). Tomorrow is forecast to be sunny, so we want to take advantage of it before its too late!
This Thursday will be my last day of work! I was hoping to be able to make it until the end of the month, but I'm at the point where I'm very tired and sore after doing just one treatment, so its time for me to stop. I will apply for maternity and parental leave benefits on Monday, so that I will still have a bit of money coming in while I'm off work.
This weekend I'll be heading over to Victoria to spend the weekend with my parents. On Sunday my Mom is throwing me a baby shower, so that should be really fun.
Next weekend I'm registered for a continuing education course on infant massage. Its just one Saturday, so once that's completed, I won't have to worry about anymore continuing education courses until the end of 2012.
The following Friday (June 3rd) I'm heading to the spa with the gift card that Daddy gave me for Mother's Day. By then I'll be 38 weeks along so I can't wait for a little pampering. You are welcome to make your big arrival anytime after that! We really only have a few little things to do before you get here, including installing the car seat and setting up your bassinet in our bedroom. We love you already and can't wait to meet and cuddle you!

Prenatal Classes

Dear Sweet Pea,

This weekend, your Dad and I attended the two-day prenatal course that I signed us up for back in January. It was for 5 hours on both Saturday and Sunday, and we got a lot of great information. The instructor was a doula who has attended over 300 births, so she had a lot of insight into what labour and delivery can look like for different women, since it varies so much. There was a lot of information that I already knew at least somewhat, but it was great for Daddy, who hasn't done quite as much reading and talking to other moms as I have! We learned all about what goes on during each stage of labour, from that first contraction to the delivery of the placenta. She talked a lot about c-sections too, so even though that's the last way I want to deliver, its good to know the information so that it wouldn't be a big surprise if it came to that. We were really interested to find out that elective C-sections aren't even legal (at least in BC), but there are still many doctors and obstetricians that will schedule them. I've definitely heard of moms who decide they simply don't want to go through the experience of labour and delivery, so they opt for a C-section instead. It makes sense though that they should only be done if medically necessary, but that's definitely not the case.
We got to practice a few good positions for labour and delivery, and she gave a lot of tips to the Dads (ways for them to help as opposed to just sitting back and watching, and not knowing what to do or say). We learned about some natural options for pain relief and to speed labour along if necessary. Finally we spent about an hour or two on baby care, including diapering, swaddling, bathing, and the correct use of the car seat.
In August, our class will get the chance to meet up again for a little reunion to learn about how everyone's birth went, and of course to show off our babies!
Overall it was well worth the time and money, and we're both really glad we went.
Tomorrow we'll be attending a breastfeeding class, so that should be good as well. After that we'll be all set to meet you!

Mother's Day

Dear Sweet Pea,

Today is Mother's Day, but since you're still about a month away from your arrival, I certainly wasn't expecting any gifts or "Happy Mother's Day" wishes. I was very pleasantly surprised when your Daddy presented me with a nice card, as well as a gift card for an afternoon at the spa! Its funny because I had actually set aside some of my own money to go get my nails done before you arrive. Now I get to enjoy a facial, manicure, and pedicure once I'm finished work in two weeks. I will really enjoy it, because it might be a while before I get to something like that again. Your Daddy is the best!